- Crowley: Hey, Gabriel, what's red and bad for your teeth?
- Gabriel: Wh--
- *Crowley hits him in the face with a brick*
I’m so glad I get to use all three of these
- Gabriel: *drunk and trying to flirt* Soooo, Bilzeebab. Bezlebib. Belzib-- Beez. Can I call you Beez?
- Beelzebub: no
- Gabriel: Soooo. Buzz.
ashbur asked:
look man, i just gotta ask, was ollie a good boy? he looked like a real good boy, and without confirmation i may go batshit.
neil-gaiman answered:
He was.
But he bit David Tennant in the leg at the airfield, the first time David as Crowley threw back his arms and stopped time.
(Not his fault. He’d been trained to bite Famine, and got a bit mixed up.)
Complaint to A-Ziraph, on the matter of some clay tablets
When we met, you said to me as follows: “I will sell you the rare clay tablets you inquire about.” You left then, but you did not do what you promised me. You sent my messenger away with rude words and said: “If you want a clay tablet so much, you can damn well inscribe one yourself: go away, now, we’re closed.”
What do you take me for, that you treat somebody like me with such contempt? I have sent as messengers gentlemen like ourselves to your archives to collect the tablets with my money but you have treated me with contempt by sending them back to me empty-handed several times, and that through streets made dangerous by the frequent passage of a certain wild charioteer, claiming each time that your archives have just closed or that the copper ingots sent to you with my messengers are not good copper. You alone of all the traders in Dilmun have treated me with contempt.
Crossing Paths
Okay, so I will freely admit that as soon as I did the Sodom and Gomorrah chapter, I got thinking about this scene and had to write it. I’m also playing a bit fast-and-loose with the years, because funnily enough, no one knows exactly when they were and no two theologians seem to agree on anything.
1448BC - Mount Sinai
All things considered, it had all gone rather well.
While Moses was not entirely comfortable with non-hieroglyphic letters, he had paid close attention as Aziraphale helpfully explained what each of the commandments were. Most of them were common sense, but humans did tend to need some very direct instructions from time to time.
They were quite beautiful too, inscribed into smooth slabs of polished stone, and still glowed with the inner light of divine fire.
Aziraphale had to admitted he was rather excited to see what the children of Israel would make of them. After all, the Almighty so seldom make direct contact these days, especially not to hand-deliver a Being a Good Human manual.
If there’s one thing all the Doctors have in common it’s the genuine shock of meeting humans with equal sass.
Imagine all the Sass Masters in the TARDIS at one time. I think the Doctor would cry, every single one of them.
I CAN’T BELIEVE IT MY DREAM CAME TRUE , I WANTED SO SO BAD THIS SONG TO A FAN VIDEO !!!
squeeegs
