DS9 continues to be relevant.
Fun fact: I saved my gif font setting on a gif from atomic blonde
So every time I put the font on a gif there stands fuck and honestly it’s such a mood
Why you should watch The Three Musketeers (1993)
- the opening scene where tim curry literally enters on a gondola as part of a river styx/hell metaphor, complete with an underground sewer dungeon
- tim curry delivering some of the most over-the-top, yet somehow understated one-liners:
- “all for one……… and more for me…….”
- “remember, kings come and kings go, but one thing remains the same, and that….. is me”
- captain rochefort’s whisper-acting throughout the whole movie
- rivaled only by kiefer sutherland’s grumble-acting
- “only a fool would try to arrest us twice in one day” “you’re under arrest!” “a fool.”
- rochefort dramatically slicing through the castle candles
- “the cardinal! we have to hurry!” “you two have a date?” “no, it’s the cardinal, he’s conspiring against the king!” “tell us something we don’t know.”
- the whole bar scene where the guys teach d’artagnan how to pick up chicks
- “d’artagnan rides with me” “see you in calais –” “OR HELL”
- porthos and aramis’ bromance
- charlie sheen being as suave as you’ll ever see him:
- “you’re married?!” “yes i’m married!” “ohhh - we must pray for our sins” [husband bursts in and shoots at him] “on second thought, God’s often busy”
- also - charlie sheen playing a priest
- “champagne?” “we’re in the middle of a chase, porthos!” “you’re right. something red.”
- chris o’donnell fulfilling every whiny 90s teen stereotype
- pretty Austrian landscapes
- “this _____ was a gift to me, from the _____ of ______”
- the Eighth Doctor himself playing the foppish, squealing comic relief
- milady de winter barely breaking a monotone through the whole movie, even right before she throws herself off a cliff
- charlie sheen and tim curry’s interactions???? like:
- “you are under arrest, charged with treason” “you of all people should know, that the cardinal does not answer to the laws of men” “then you’ll answer to GOD!” [tim curry shoots charlie sheen] “you first.”
- the sword fighting is actually pretty good
- king louis bearing a striking resemblance to elijah wood
oh but you forgot
- the fact that rochefort NEVER MOVES HIS FACIAL MUSCLES. even when he’s like “you are ORDERED to DISPERSE!!!” he never raises his voice or changes his neutral facial expression.
- porthos insisting that he’s totally famous throughout the movie and you never believe him until it turns out to be true
- porthos: hmmm, five of them, three of us, hardly seems fair.
[d’artagnan tries to enter the huddle; porthos pushes him out]
aramis: maybe we should give them a chance to surrender
d’artagnan, completely missing the point: EXCUSE ME but there’s FOUR of us - every line out of porthos’ mouth tbh
- god. the GAY.
- the sword high five every time porthos and aramis meet up or have to separate
- athos: you need a lesson in manners, boy.
d’artagnan: any time - actually just everything between athos and d’artgnan to be perfectly honest. and I am including athos drunk!venting to d’artagnan about how stupid love is.
- the awkward teenage dorkiness of king louis xiii and the badassery of his wife, anne of austria
- oatmeal face guy
- the 90s pop song over the ending credits
I fucking love this movieeeeeeeee
You forgot “PORTHOS THE PIRATE”
‘cause when it’s alllll forrrr oneeee
it’s ALL FOR LOOOOVE
gotham, s04e05: Bruce Wayne -Vs- Ra’s al Ghul
It’s good to see that Screamin’ Eyes Bashir rides again.
I don’t usually have interesting dreams but the other night I had this one the other night abt this tiefling girl that looked like this
And she was going to like a fantasy version of my college and she rode a ripstick down to the beach while looking at her phone like a badass. But at the beach there were these 3 guys made out of wet sand that looked kinda like this
They were making this little mud/sand pillars in a rectangular pit they had dug out and a bunch of people had stopped to watch
But when the tiefling girl stopped to watch they noticed and started talking to each other like “is that the one we want” and “yeah she’s the one” (all their “speech” appeared as like rpg dialogue with their face and the text next to it)
So the one with the little head came up behind her and knocked her out with a big lump of wet sand I think
She woke up in like the back of a little shop that seemed to be empty but Mightve once sold crappy souvenirs idk and this thing was on the ceiling
It landed on her face and injected part of itself into her ear like some kind of alien parasite before landing in a nearby chair and morphing into this
Basically it wanted her to run errands for it because I guess its sand henchmen couldn’t leave the beach for long
But like all the errands were just buying it stupid shit and the girl was despairing because it would force her to miss her classes and use her own money. The only thing I remember her getting was this $30 box of “medicine” that turned out to be tiny sausages in anime themed wrappers
Idk what it means but I’m kinda invested this premise now
Who you should fight: Norse Studies Edition
Snorri:
Who wins: You, but indirectly. It’s best to just leave him alone.
First of all, you could fight Snorri but why would you want to? He may be a slight little old man who enjoys taking bubble-baths and writing textbooks, but this dude is freaking dangerous. He’s a respected lawspeaker with old money who sires basically the beginning of the Icelandic mafia known as the
Age of the Sturlungs, you don’t wanna fuck with that. However…It honestly doesn’t matter if you fight him or not, considering the King of Norway has it out for him real bad. Still, don’t fight Snorri.
Saxo:
Who wins: You. Oh my god please just hurry up and punch him in the face pleaaaaaase.
Saxo Grammaticus more like Saxo kiss my assicus. Dude made a living by being a cranky spoil sport who wrote almost exclusively in a gaudy Latin style because he thought he was hot shit. He’s not hot shit though, he’ll probably go down with one punch and a whimper. His name literally means “Saxo the Literate” or “the Grammarian.” Please, beat this nerd into the ground before I do it for you.
Tacitus:
Who wins: Nobody.
Don’t fight Tacitus, that would just be sad. The man was just doing his best. Leave him to play with his manuscripts and dinky roman coin collection, he’ll get tired and go home eventually.
Adam of Bremen:
Who wins: Adam of Bremen
This is a man living off of pure anger and the promises of Christian martyrdom alone. He probably even made up most of his descriptions of the Temple at Uppsala, just to fuck with archaeologists and historians hundreds of years later. What a prick. Don’t fight Adam of Bremen, he will fight dirty, hit you with a crucifix upside the head, and you will die. Amen, motherfucker.
Ahmad ibn Fadlān ibn al-Abbās ibn Rāšid ibn Hammād:
Who wins: Nobody!
Don’t fight ibn Fadlān!!! Even if you disagree with his ethnographic portrayals of the ‘Varangians,’ holy shit don’t fight him?? He is strong and he is patient. He only wants to explain Islamic law and talk about the correct forms of hygiene that’s it, just let him do his thing in peace! Even if you do end up wining in a fight, this man was sent by the embassy directed by the Abbasid Caliph of Baghdad! People WILL go looking for you AND HUNT YOU DOWN. This is an important man! Don’t sign your own death wish!!
Ari Þorgilsson:
Who wins: Ari
Who the fuck are you even trying to fool? This man wrote
Íslendingabók, and he will bludgeon you to death with it. Go home, tell your kids you love them, watch a sunset, eat a candy bar. Don’t fight Ari.
Olaus Petri [actul name in life: Olof Pettersson ] ( 1493 – 1552) :
do not fight him, give this dude a break.
critical of alot the nationalistic swedish historical narrative used popular in sweden during medieval time, and during his life time.
constantly harassed by king gustav vasa who wanted him to write history according to the propaganda of gustav, and how was fully ready to execute him for treason because… he did not like Olaus Petri.
being harrased by gustav vasa is the Worst Fate, and punishment enough for most sins. do not fight him.
Peder Svart ( dead 1562)
the author of the very succesful propaganda epic about Gustav Vasas rise to power. FIGHT HIM!!!
his propaganda story, has been taught for hundreds of years in sweden as truth. Peder Svart is a dude you want to punch in the face.
Ericus Olai (dead 1486)
remembered for having popularised the historical narrative of the the goths, read germanics, were all descended from sweden (=göticism), a idea which was used through swedish history for jingostic and nationalistic reasons. (also a popular idea among literal nazis, during modern history)
FIGHT THIS DUDE!! I BEG YOU! FIGHT HIM!
Anne Rice did initially release a statement to this effect, and threatened legal action against fanfic writers, but has more recently retracted this statement! I have a citation for this somewhere in my notes that I could get, but I’m on my phone and it would be later!
She retracted because she realized modern fandom would throw her into a woodchipper if she tried to doxx them into submission like she used to try and do when she sent her fans after anyone who posted negative reviews or fan content she didn’t like. Real piece of work that one.
I didn’t know this. I grew up reading her books. Excuse me while I go scream at her books.
Yea. Same. I had the same kind of reaction when I found out that Marion Zimmer Bradley was a raging asshole to fans. And also y’know, the whole child sex abuse scandal. I’m not normally one for burning books, but that one was cathartic.
You didn’t even need to write fanfic or post a negative review to call on one of Anne Rice’s shitstorms - all you had to do was say something even slightly negative on one of the forums (such as ‘I’m not sure it’s fair to be that nasty to a teenager’) and all of her fans would come after you. She’d act like it had nothing to do with her, but she always made comments that encouraged her fans to do that sort of stuff - if she wasn’t doing it herself.
She was a legitimate piece of shit to a lot of people, and partly why Ao3 is such a big thing with it’s entire fucking legal team that protects transformative works from people like her. I very much doubt that she changed her mind with how she regards fanfic or how she treats people online (her most recent bullshit regarding harassing people online was in 2015) it’s simply that her bullying and harassment was so well documented we gave her nowhere to hide and she had to back down or face the consequences of being a horrible person.
bee-squared-official
