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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
spaceexp

SpaceX launches satellites but fails to recover rocket

spaceexp

Washington (AFP) June 15, 2016
image SpaceX successfully launched two satellites into orbit on Wednesday, but failed in an attempt to land the first stage of its Falcon 9 rocket undamaged on a barge in the Atlantic. The rocket apparently malfunctioned some 330 feet (70 meters) off the ground and was in flames when it reached the platform on the powered barge - known as a drone ship - live images via a SpaceX webcast showed.
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colonel-kira-nerys
jacksondeforestkelley

kelley freely shared his joy in making star trek iv with friend david madsen, who visited the sets of the films and by the mid-1980s had become a dominant publisher in the star trek world. of course, for kelley, the highlight was filming in a california hospital. “that was a great kick! my greatest kick was when i came down the hall, and that little woman is lying on the table, and i ask her ‘what’s your problem?’ and then she comes down the hall, saying, ‘i grew a kidney! i grew a kidney!’ that was hilarious! it was so funny to me when they were doing it. that little woman was marvelous.”

“if you have any problems, just call me.” mccoy patted her cheek and then wove his way along the corridor. bennett recalls that he wrote that particular moment to honor his assistant, sylvia rubinstein, who had long waited a kidney transplant. if only bones had could have been there for her. just call him. such sentiments were echoed in every audience watching the film. nearly every heart paused for a loved one. if only they could have called leonard mccoy. bennett remembers the fun of the hospital, “a sheer star turn. i didn’t write it, but it is all bones a leader. even shatner kind of had to back off, because he had to be the fish out of water in the hospital. my assistant, may she rest in peace, died before the move was released. the hospital segement is dedicated to her.” x

aenramsden
gatheringbones

concept: Aliens who have absolutely no cultural or personal use for humor as a concept, but are very adept at figuring out socio-linguistic systems and how to manipulate them. Being funny makes humans more comfortable and easier to negotiate with, and it’s easy enough once you familiarize yourself with a particular culture and set your speech synthesizers to the correct setting. 

and i mean sure eventually they’re great at it, but at some point in time a group of haggard aliens in a room somewhere compare notes on irony, hyperbole, and cultural references, with one exhausted individual clicking “No, Gxiiijhux VIII, puns are a no-go, puns are counterproductive, I don’t care if Susan emitted optimal pleasure decibels, everyone else in that room hated you.” 

setepenre-set

Gxiiijhux VIII finds xemself unexpectedly annoyed at the Merchant-Leader’s correction. 

Although further experience indicates that the Merchant-Leader is right about the puns, Gxiiijhux VIII somehow cannot help xemself from clicking out several more of them during the next negotiation session. (All of the humans in the room groan except for Susan, who, again, emits optimal pleasure decibels)

“You need to stop,” the Merchant Leader clicks in frustration.

(But Gxiiijhux VIII can’t seem to stop.)

Gxiiijhux VIII realizes halfway through the trade negotiations that xie is more interested in causing Susan to emit the optimal pleasure decibels than in the successful negotiation of a lucrative trade regulation treaty. This causes xem much stress and confusion.

Eventually, the marriage of Gxiiijhux VIII and Susan is included as a feature of the treaty.

(Gxiiijhux VIII’s former associates breathe a sigh of relief as the merchant ship pulls away from the space station, leaving Gxiiijhux VIII, Susan, and the terrible puns behind.)

Gxiiijhux VIII never does quite get the human concept of humor, but xie is quite content to spend xyr life listening to Susan make the optimal pleasure decibel sounds anyway.