If you’re unsure how to pet a cat (i.e., maybe you didn’t have cats around growing up), it can be helpful to bear in mind that petting is a grooming activity. Grooming each other is how cats bond. Of course, each cat will have individual preferences, but the fact that it’s a grooming thing gives you two basic places to start:

• Scratch areas that the cat has difficulty reaching, like the chin and upper throat, behind the ears, or the the very top of the head. (Watch the body language here - you’ll know if you pick the wrong spot right away.)
  
• Work your fingers deeply into areas of thick fur where tangles are likely to form, like around the shoulderblades or the ruff of the neck. (You may come away with a handful of loose fur; this means you’re doing it right.)

Also, if you’re unsure of how to approach, try extending your hand with the palm up and the fingers relaxed for the cat to sniff. It’s the cat equivalent of a handshake - cats sniff each other to see where they’ve been, and for humans, it’s the hands that carry our scent history, since we touch everything constantly.