For the Star Trek Rare Pairs Swap
Damar/Weyoun (in the Deep Dish 9 AU verse)
@the-capricious-one who requested a fanwork featuring Damar/Weyoun.
I wrote this in the Deep Dish 9 universe. I have been stuck on writing and @ladyvean suggested I try to write something lighter since I tend to write heavy things. So this is what came of that and I really enjoyed it. @the-capricious-one I hope you like it too!
~Shoddy Customer Service~
Summary:
Most of the staff of Terok Northside Pizza is out sick, it’s a busy night, and Damar has to deliver pizzas on his scooter… and he meets Weyoun who only makes his terrible night even worse.
*Deep Dish Nine AU*
Damar grumbled to himself as he fitted the visor over his slick black hair. As management, the right hand of Dukat, he didn’t have to wear the full Terok Northside Pizza uniform but tonight Damar was not management. A large portion of his staff had called off for the night and the store was busy. The phone was ringing off the hook with orders, and the lobby was full too. The problem was that there were no delivery drivers and that was going to make things very difficult. He wanted to take Ziyal and Rugal from up front and send one of them out. But the front was so busy it would be quicker to just go out and deliver the pizza’s himself. Damar sighed. It was a bad night for half of the store employees to come down with stomach flu.
Damar loaded pizza boxes into their insulated carrier to keep them warm and carried them to the parking lot. His shoulders slumped when his gaze fell upon his scooter. It was more than embarassing but he’d gotten one too many DUI’s and now his prized possession, his baby, the only really nice thing he owned, was sitting in his garage at home collecting more dust than the envelopes piled on the kitchen table that held his credit card statements. His house may have been shitty, and falling apart, and he may have had to grimace when drinking his cheap booze, and the coat he was wearing was probably decades old—but his car was a dream. The older model Porsche was out of his league but he felt like a sex god when he was behind the wheel. He had restored it himself in a labor of love and the day anyone so much as breathed on it wrong would be the day that he went away for murder. He had caught Rugal in the parking lot one day snapping a photo of Ziyal sitting on the shiny red hood and had nearly murdered her with a pizza slicer. Had her father not been visiting the store that day things probably would have gone far worse than they had. Crushing the screen of Rugal’s I-Phone beneath his boot had not been revenge enough.
His baby certainly would have been his friend this night, though he would have had to have scrounged up a blanket to lay over the leather seats. Greasy pizza boxes would not dare to touch that pristine interior.
Damar narrowed his eyes at the scooter. Having to ride the pathetic little thing instead of sliding into the drivers seat of his beloved car made him feel as though he’d been castrated. He adjusted his visor with purpose, and marched forward, deciding he needed to just get the pizzas to their recipients and get the dreaded task out of the way. He had brought out some bungee cords that he’d found in the utility closet and he used them to secure the pizza to the back of the scooter. Once he was satisfied the boxes weren’t going to be roadkill once he got going, he straddled the vinyl seat.
Pretend it’s a beautiful Harley with a cherry red gas tank, and a sexy pinup girl painted on the side of the tank too. Yeah, and her tits are falling out of a top that doesn’t have enough buttons.
Damar’s dreams were dashed when he started the scooter and it sounded so pathetic. Certainly not the roar of a motorcycle that would vibrate between his legs as he rode it like a beast.
I need a leather jacket, Damar thought to himself. I bet Dukat has one… with studs down the shoulders.
But Damar did not have a leather jacket, just a thin, faded, canvas jacket, a visor with hair grease on the inside of the band, and a scooter full of pizza and bad life choices.
(full story below)
deepintheshadyglen