[discworldtour]

“Are any of the levers marked?” said Ponder, scrabbling through Leonard’s sketches.
“Yes, but I don’t understand them! Here’s one marked ‘Troba’!”
Ponder scanned the pages, covered in Leonard’s backwards writing. “Er… er…” he muttered.
“Do not pull the lever marked ‘Troba’!” snapped Lord Vetinari, leaning forward.
“My lord!” said Ponder, and went red as Lord Vetinari’s gaze fell upon him. “I’m sorry, my lord, but this is rather technical, it is about machinery, and it would perhaps be better if those whose education had been more in the field of the arts did not…”
His voice faded under the Patrician’s stare.
“This one’s got a normal label! It’s called ‘Prince Haran’s Tiller’!” said a desperate voice from the omniscope.
Lord Vetinari patted Ponder Stibbons on the shoulder.
“I quite understand,” he said. “The last thing a trained machinery person wants at a time like this is well-meant advice from ignorant people. I do apologize. And what is it that you intend to do?”
“Well, I, er, I…”
“As the Kite and all our hopes plunge towards the ground, I mean,” Lord Vetinari went on.
“I, er, I, let’s see, we’ve tried…”
Ponder stared at the omniscope, and at his notes. His mind had become a huge, white, sticky field of hot fluff.
“I imagine we have at least a minute left,” said Lord Vetinari. “No rush.”
“I, er, perhaps we, er…”
The Patrician leaned down towards the omniscope. “Rincewind, pull Prince Haran’s Tiller,” he said.
“We don’t know what it does–” Ponder began.
“Do tell me if you have a better idea,” said Lord Vetinari. “In the meantime, I suggest that the lever is pulled.”
On the Kite, Rincewind decided to respond to the voice of authority.
“Er… there’s a lot of clicking and whirring…” he reported. “And… some of the levers are moving by themselves… now the wings are unfolding… we’re sort of flying in a straight line, at least… quite gently, really…”
“Good. I suggest you apply yourself to waking up Leonard,” said the Patrician. He turned and nodded at Ponder. “You yourself have not studied the classics, young man? I know Leonard has.”
“Well… no, sir.”
“Prince Haran was a legendary Klatchian hero who sailed around the world on a ship with a magical tiller,” said Lord Vetinari. “It steered the ship while he slept. If I can be of any further help, don’t hesitate to ask.”

– never let the imminent destruction of the world stop you from being dramatic: the Havelock Vetinari story | Terry Pratchett, The Last Hero