KING COGIDUBNUS TAKES QUINTUS ON A TOUR OF HIS AULA (PALACE). IT’S FANCY AS FUCK. QUINTUS LOOKS AT THE PICTURAE. THEN HE LOOKS AT THE FLORES. THEN HE LOOKS AT THE FONS. QUINTUS IS GETTING DESPERATE TO BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF SOMETHING. THE TOUR GOES ON. THERE IS NO FUCKING ESCAPE. IT’S DINNER TIME. QUINTUS LOOKS AT AN EGG. SURPRISE! IT’S FULL OF MOTHERFUCKING SALTATRICES (DANCERS). THE TOUR IS UNENDING. THERE ARE HUMOROUS DWARVES. A SINGLE TEAR TRICKLES DOWN QUINTUS’ CHEEK.

THEN AN URSA (BEAR) SHOWS UP. QUINTUS LIVENS UP IMMEDIATELY. IS HE GOING TO GET TO MURDER THE SHIT OUT OF IT?

THE BEAR ESCAPES. EVERYONE IS SHIT AT BEARS. ALL THE OTHERS TRY TO KILL THE BEAR, BUT TO NO AVAIL. QUINTUS PICKS UP A HASTA (SPEAR) AND STABS THE BEAR IN THE FACE REPEATEDLY UNTIL IT DIES. QUINTUS FEELS THAT THE TRIP HAS BEEN ENTIRELY WORTH IT. HELL FUCKING YES.